NLP Liverpool

Coaching Tips

Setting Direction.

Part 8 - What won't happen if you don't get it?

“Thinking begins when you ask really difficult questions.”

– Slavoj Žižek, Slovenian Philosopher

Over the last 25 years, I’ve been helping clients achieve their goals.

I’ve noticed that the most common asset successful clients possess is their mindset. And if there’s one question you can ask that will really get them thinking and let you uncover that mindset, it’s the question:-

“What won’t happen if you don’t get your goal?”

Often, the first reaction to this question is one of confusion, even when this question is used as part of the sequence of questions to identify “secondary gain” (see the previous 3 articles).

The second reaction is to treat the question as a double negative (which, of course, it is).

By processing the question as a double negative, it will often elicit answers similar to the first question in the sequence (“What will happen if you get your goal?), though, in this instance, the answers will be framed in the negative.

For example, recently a client’s goal was to expand the sectors his recruitment business works in so he could increase the number of people he employs, building flexibility and resilience in his company.

Initially, his answers to the question “What won’t happen if you don’t expand the sectors you work in?” were that he wouldn’t have the flexibility and resilience within the business for the busy times and during holidays, nor would there be an increase in turnover and value of the company.

Notice how all his initial goals are framed in the negative (“we won’t have the flexibility...” etc.).

Upon further exploration of the question, particularly around the sectors he’d initially identified, the answers began to change.

Soon, his answers became… “Well, if we don’t make inroads into that sector, we can look at other sectors. We won’t give up, we’ll keep going until we get the results we need to make this a success.”

As we continued, we identified a pipeline of five other sectors with commercial potential. His team would be able to exploit these immediately or as time progressed.

By asking this difficult question, my client’s mindset became more focused on creating and achieving the goals he’d set for the business, to the point where he was pre-emptively answering my next few questions with real excitement about working towards the positive goal.

So, today, ask yourself and your clients the thought-provoking question “What won’t happen if you don’t get your goal?”

As you ask this question, notice how the answers develop.

If you’d like any help exploring your own goals then get in touch – call us on 0151 931 5184 or email us at enquiries@nlpliverpool.com

Next time we’ll explore the question “What do you get to have or keep by having this problem/staying as you are?”

© NLP Liverpool Limited 2024